Okay, so I haven't updated in a while...a little less than three months actually. I was a bit busy with other things and to be honest, I sort of forgot about this blog and the lovely Cultures-Shocked forum.
You guys already know that I want to go to South Korea...and I failed to convince my parents to let me go this summer. It seems as if everyone I know is going there this summer as if to spite me, haha...so in the midst of my boredom, I remembered this blog.
Anyway, I wanted to update to say that now I'm not sure whether or not I want to go to Korea. It seems a bit ridiculous actually to think that way since I've been wanting to go there for almost my entire life and now I'm not so sure. Actually, the reason behind this is not because I don't want to go abroad, but because I'm now attracted to Spain. I've always wanted to go to Spain, but it wasn't this great big desire I had.
After watching Euro Cup 2008, I think my passion for Spain has grown stronger. Okay, okay, so I'll admit that at first, I was rooting for Spain because ...my favorite soccer player is Spanish (Fernando Torres), but then I fell in love with several other Spanish players as well! (Iker Casillas, David Villa, David Silva, and Sergio Ramos to name a few). Usually, when I watch games like this, I don't really have a side I'm rooting for unless South Korea is involved haha...but I think I fell in love with the Spanish team and that sea of red in the stands was just beautiful to me.
By the way, I'm not saying that I want go to Spain because I like the Spanish soccer team...in all honesty, there was some weird thing going on inside my mind and heart when I was rooting for Spain and I saw and heard all the fans...and that final match against Germany was absolutely beautiful. Spain really deserved it.
So...yeah, I have no idea what I'm trying to say here, but basically, while watching Euro Cup 2008, I fell in love with Spain. ...Yeah. I don't really get what I'm trying to say here.
Oh by the way, side note. I hear a lot of people exclaiming that they like Torres too and oh my goodness, he's a hottie! I'm sorry to say that this irritates me a bit. I did not start liking Torres because he was hot. Seriously, I love soccer and for someone to become one of my favorite players, that person needs to be amazing at soccer. I am not one of those fans that started loving him after he soared into popularity after joining Liverpool although there is nothing wrong with that because he did do a fantastic job this season...so for someone to start liking him because he played beautifully, that's great, but there are fans that just like him because he's so popular right now. And then all the girls scream that he's so hot...
I have no idea why, but it just irritates me when it's the first thing that pops out of their mouth. It's not "Oh, you like Torres too? He's amazing at soccer!" It's "AHHH I LOVE TORRES TOO! HE'S SO HOT!"
That's not why I started liking him for goodness sake. If you want the story, here it is. It's nothing amazing so I hope you don't have excitement dancing in your eyes. I haven't been a fan for that long, but...still. When I was watching the FIFA World Cup in the summer of 2006, I happened to see a game that Spain was playing. My mom and sister came into the living room and after seeing that it wasn't South Korea, they left and did...whatever they were doing. I stayed and my dad told me to look at some guy's hair because it was cool/funny/interesting. It was Torres. I laughed and said he had nice hair (he had a faux hawk), but I quickly lost interest because in all honesty, a lot of soccer players have cool/funny/interesting hairstyles so I'm not going to express some interest in some random soccer player just for that reason.
The thing is, at that very second, it was a closeup of him from a camera that was situated behind the netting of the goal. It zoomed out a bit and he kicked the ball and it went in the goal BEAUTIFULLY. I kept an eye on him after that. In total, he shot either 2 or 3 goals...I'm not sure which number it was....and he did it so beautifully and aesthetically. The goals were breathtaking. So basically after that, after several years of loving soccer, I found my favorite soccer player. I found out his name, his number, and I just started finding random information about him in general. He was, at an early age, the captain of a club called Atletico Madrid and I've been following him since then. It was a bit annoying that I couldn't really see the games because...honestly, I don't know where to go to watch the games.
And even though he was not up there with the likes of Cristiano Ronaldo and etc. etc. etc. that the girls fawn over, I was very happy to be a Torres fan. And then he moved to Liverpool which I found out after I had watched a match with Liverpool and Chelsea...During that game, I was kind of stuck since both teams play well and...yeah, I didn't really have a chance to watch them play so I didn't have a side to root for and randomly, my dad blurted out that Chelsea was a good team...so I decided to root for Liverpool instead. I don't know. It was a completely random decision. Imagine my joy when Torres joined Liverpool after I rooted for them, hahahaha. But honestly, I was proud and I was so happy that he got this great chance.
So yeah, this is my explanation of why I'm not a completely new fan of Torres who likes him because he's hot.
Honestly, there's so much about Torres I like and every day, I become a bigger fan. He's made me a bigger fan of soccer in general as well and I'm grateful about that.
Anyway, this post went off on a tangent. It's really random, but whatever. I hope you guys are enjoying summer right now! How nice it is to have a break from school and sleep in every day. I can finally catch up on the sleep I was lacking throughout the entire school year (which may have caused me to get permanent dark circles under my eyes which makes me rather upset...hopefully, more sleep, relaxation, and exercise this summer will cure me of that since I never actually had dark circles in the first place until this year).
It's been a while since I updated. I don't really have anything to say, but I was super excited last night since Epik High's 5th album was coming out.
For those of you that don't know who Epik High is, please consider checking them out. They're amazing.
I can't go. It's final ): I got into one of the biggest arguments I had in years with my mom (she's the boss in our family haha) yesterday and we were talking about YFU...and then went on to other stuff we kept under the carpet that were bothering us.
I was really upset, but I got to convince my mom that I really wanted this. She kept trying to say that if I really wanted to go, I can go during the summer of senior year with my friends, but I don't want to go as a tourist (as I told her repeatedly). I convinced her to think about letting me go next year ESPECIALLY since I don't have any SAT IIs and the SAT to worry about since I'm done with everything by then (except some SAT IIs for courses I take next year, but those are fine...I can take them in May or June or something).She told me that I had to do several things before she even considers letting me go. First, take the SAT IIs and DO NOT CANCEL THEM (lol). After I didn't cancel them, I have to get the scores and they must be good. Second is much, much, much harder...it's to get a or above on the SAT ): I tried lowering it to 2100, went up to 2200, and my mom said 2300 and kept ranting about it. Third thing is to maintain an extremely good GPA next year. And probably a bunch of more stuff she's going to tell me.
*rips hair out*
...but I'll prove it to her. I'll work extremely hard because this is basically a LIFELONG dream for me...
...and ow, I just banged my knee on the table as I tried to put my legs up onto the chair while uploading a song. I'm going to upload a song for every entry I put on this Vox blog...I pretty much guarantee it...I've done it for all the previous entries on here. Hey, maybe someone will wander by and think it's interesting. This song is called "Men Are Also Helpless" by Evan (his stage name...I conveniently forgot his Korean name right now =_=) who was in a boy group called Click-B (I know of them, but I don't know what happened to them. I'm guessing they split up) and now had a debut solo album last year. He has a new album out, but I haven't heard it yet.
If anyone wants the Korean and the translated (English) lyrics, here it is:
Korean: 남자도... 어쩔 수 없다
Verse1)
입술이 모두 말라가고
한숨이 자꾸 잦아들고
이 사랑이 지쳐 시들도록
난 이렇게 버려둔다
Bridge1)
널 하나도 기억 못한다고
널 무심히 모두 잊었다고
하루종일 날 봐도
아무도 알지 못할만큼
무슨 일이 있는 듯
없는 듯 희미해진다
Sabi)
표정 없이 살다 마음 없이 산다
나 그런대로 이렇게
(나 표정 없이 살다가 마음 없이 살고~)
술을 마셔 본다 너에 취해 본다
더 흘릴 눈물 하나 없는데
(나 술을 마셔 보지만 너를 잊지 못해~)
남자도 사랑 앞에선 모두 어쩔 수 없다
너를 묻고 살다 자꾸 꺼내 본다
너는 모르겠지 이런 나
Verse2)
말수가 점점 줄어들고
끊은 담배가 또 늘어가고
자꾸만 멍하게 지내는
시간이 점점 길어지고
난 어디에도 마음을
가슴을 둘 수 없는데
Sabi)
표정 없이 살다 마음 없이 산다
나 그런대로 이렇게
(나 표정 없이 살다가 마음 없이 살고~)
술을 마셔 본다 너에 취해 본다
더 흘릴 눈물 하나 없는데
(나 술을 마셔 보지만 너를 잊지 못해~)
남자도 사랑 앞에선 모두 어쩔 수 없다.
너를 묻고 산다 자꾸 꺼내 본다
너는 모르겠지 이런 나
Bridge2)
괜찮아 늘 말을 하며
겨우 하루를 또 보낸다
Sabi2)
숨만 쉬며 살다 너를 잃고 산다
그런대로 이렇게
숨을 쉬긴 한다 살아지긴 한다
더 흘릴 눈물 하나 없는데,
남자도 사랑 앞에선 모두 어쩔 수 없다
하고 싶던 말이 못해줬던 말이
자꾸 입안에서 맴돌아
아무렇지 않은듯 말해본다 혼잣말
#숨만 쉬며 살다 너를 잃고 산다
그런대로 이렇게
남자도 사랑 앞에선 모두 어쩔 수 없다
하고 싶던 말이 못해줬던 말이
자꾸 입안에서 맴돌아
아무렇지 않은듯 말해본다 혼잣말
Ending)
Hard to breath~ 사랑해 미안하다.
ENGLISH TRANSLATION (btw, I don't know what Sabi means. I'm guessing someone did the background vocals?)
Verse1)
My lips go dry
My sighs start coming in
Until this love tires, dries out
I just throw it down like this
Bridge1)
That I can’t remember you for anything
That I haven’t forgotten you for one second
Every single day I see myself
Nobody knows the extent
That something has happened
Or has not, memories fading
Sabi)
Living without expression, live without heart
Just the way it is like this
(I live without expression and live without heart)
I try a drink of alcohol, try intoxicating on
you
Even if I have no more tears to cry
(I’ve tried to drink but can’t forget you)
Even a man is helpless under love
I bury you, keep taking you out like a keepsake
You probably don’t know this of me
Verse2)
Speech is decreasing
Burnt out cigarettes are increasing
I keep spending my time in a blank
That time keeps getting longer
I can’t put my heart anywhere in my soul
Sabi)
Life without expression, live without heart
Just the way it is like this
(I live without expression and live without heart)
I try a drink of alcohol, try intoxicating on you
Even if I have no more tears to cry
(I’ve tried to drink but can’t forget you)
Even a man is helpless under love
I bury you, keep taking you out like a keepsake
You probably don’t know this of me
Bridge2)
It’s O.K. I often say
Barely do I get through the day
Sabi2)
I do breathe, I do live on
I have no more tears to cry
Even a man is helpless under love
The words I wanted to say, the words I
couldn’t say before
Keep rolling around my mouth
Unresponsive; I talk to myself
# I live just breathing I live forgetting you
Just the way it is like this
Even a man is helpless under love
The words I wanted to say, the words I
couldn’t say before
Keep rolling around my mouth
Unresponsive; I talk to myself
Ending)
Hard to breath . Hard to breath I love you, I’m so sorry.
I want to make this a long entry, but considering that it's 12:30 AM right now and I'm extremely tired, I don't think I will.
I'm really frustrated though. My dad has always said that he doesn't care if I do or don't go to Korea; I just needed my mom's permission and he would be fine with it because he didn't exactly want to talk to my mom and have it escalate into a huge fight. The application deadline is April 1 and obviously I won't have the application handed in on time. However, I have talked to a YFU representative and they said that it's okay if it's a week or two late after the deadline since I basically have almost everything ready (except the things I need my parents for such as the medical insurance portion, the signature requirements, health information (which I need to go to the doctor for), and asking my teacher to fill out a recommendation letter for me (because I don't want to ask her to spend her time writing one when I might not even be able to go). Other than that, everything is filled out. I just need the $575.
Anyway, I talked to my dad in the car while I was being driven home today and I was a bit nervous bringing up the subject yet again. I have no idea why but every time I mention vaguely that I want to "do something in the summer", my parents always ask, "What is it?"...so I tell them that it's something I've been mentioning to them quite a lot in the past few months and they seem to forget every single time I mention this so I have to drop the word and say "Korea".
Then their mood totally sours and they abruptly cut me off, saying they don't want to talk about it.
Since my dad is the easier one to convince, I talked to him about it and yay for me, I just made him change from a "whatever" to a "ABSOLUTELY NOT!" This irritated me a bit...
The thing is, it's not only the whole not giving permission to let me go thing that's bothering me...it's that my parents don't answer me when I ask them why I can't go. Well, they do answer, but my mom's answer has always been "I'm your mom, I don't need to give you a reason" and sometimes she changes it up a bit and says "I'm your mom, I don't need to have a reason". If I press my dad, he answers, but they're the flimsiest reasons ever. It's as if they think I just happened to want to go on this program one fine day and decided that I would whineeeeeeee until they agreed.
I don't think so. I've been researching for 3 years and I'm pretty sure that if it was just a phase, it'd be over by now. People may say that it might not have faded away because I am still excited about the prospect of going to Korea, a place I've wanted to go to ever since I was little and that I never had an experience like this so I might not know the negatives about going on such a program. If anything, I thought that the program to Japan I went on last summer would convince them that I can actually survive without them.
If you want to know the truth, all my friends called their parents very frequently (about every day). I never called my parents and eventually, they called me about 3 days before the end of my trip. They had to ask a guy's mom for the number of the place I was staying at for that day and they were a little annoyed that I didn't call. Hey, you guys were the ones that were chuckling and saying I would get homesick and I've staunchily stuck to my opinion that I would probably not even be homesick even once.....and I wasn't.
Anyway, I think I should post up some of the reasons that I can think off the top of my head that my parents repeatedly say. I will then write what I think of each reason.
1. It's 6 weeks! That's too long!
My answer: I've asked for the academic year program and you guys were so vehemently against it in middle school that I decided that I would compromise although I promised myself to stick to what I want for a change. It was that important to me that I didn't want to let go of the chance and decided to do a shorter term program. Also, 6 weeks is too long? I've been in 2 weeks halfway across the world without you guys...in Asia. I'm pretty sure I have at least some kind of idea of what it's like to survive without them. Anyway, it's not like I'm going to be alone. I have a host family.
2. So? When you were on the trip to Japan, you went with a group of kids! That's totally different!
My answer: Yeah, but it's not like I knew who they were and it's not as if I was all buddy-buddy with them from the start. I knew them from the monthly meetings, but no one talked during those meetings...you seriously didn't know anyone's names after 6 meetings. They were strangers in the start too. Second thing, I've experienced a homestay for a weekend. I know that's short, but it prepared me for my decision whether or not I would want to actually go through with the whole let's-go-to-Korea thing. It was a little taste of what it would be like and I loved it IMMENSELY. This is something that actually made my desire to go on such a program stronger. Also, now I know what a homestay feels like so I'm not doing something that might turn out to be something I regret.
3. Junior year is important. You should spend your time studying for the PSATs, SATs, SAT IIs, and academic subjects that you'll take next year!
My answer: First off, just because you go on a YFU program doesn't mean you can't bring things to study from. I'm pretty sure that not every single day I spend there will be action-packed and I'll be extremely busy. I'm pretty sure that I'll be able to squeeze in at least 1~3 hours a day studying. Also, it's not for the whole summer. I can study when I come home too. Another thing, it'll be less distracting because of the time zone. Because of the time zone difference from New York and Korea (it's about 13 hours), I would rarely have a chance to spend more than 30 minutes talking to my friends. Therefore, I wouldn't really have as much distractions over there as I would have if I stayed home (and my sister won't barge in my room demanding help on whatever she's studying/working on every 5 seconds, totally disregarding that I am busy as well). I'm pretty sure that my host family would understand since academics is a REALLY big part of the culture over there; the high school schedule for most students is ridiculous...it's harder over there than it is over here in the U.S. I'm not lying about this either. A lot of my friends came from Korea and they know from experience.
Another thing, it's not as if I would have time to study for all these things if I stayed home either. Hello? Wasn't goign to Harvard this summer for the college courses what you guys wanted (as well as Mr. L's (Mr. L is mentioned in the post below this)? You might retort and say that at least I'll be in a place where I'm studying, but really, if it's a college course, how am I supposed to be studying for a gazillion other things? Not only would I be taking college courses, but it's at HARVARD UNIVERSITY. HARVARD!!!!! I'm pretty sure their courses aren't going to be the easiest things on Earth and I don't think I'll pass with flying colors or something. I'll have to focus on the courses...and also, if I'm there, what's not to say that I'll make friends? Since there are no authoritative figures such as my parents at that time that would restrict my free time and hover over me while I hang out, I think it would be very likely that I'll take a break and hang out. I know. Shocking. I would hang out...what a sensational thing to say. Living in a dormitory setting is not going to make it easier either. In fact, it might be more distracting because I'll be with whoever I'll be with for MOST of the day especially if we all dorm close to each other/with each other. How much studying would you get done if your friend shared the same room with you and you guys wanted a break from all that work you're doing?
4. You can just go to Korea at the end of your senior year.
My answer: Yes, I can and I know that I will especially since all my friends plan on going anyway, we don't have anything we're going to do during the summer, and the Fifa World Cup will be occurring at that time and Koreans are CRAZY about it. ....But if I do, I'm going as a tourist. I'll be the one in the khaki shorts and camera, taking 2735720957 pictures of 47306
719753 things. I will only have to speak a minimal amount of Korean. Heck, I can even go through the whole trip without speaking Korean at all even if I have to deal with the native Koreans! For goodness sake, I can go to the extreme and make my friends say everything for me, but knowing myself, I won't do that. But really, my friends speak English so it's not like I'm really going there and being immersed into the culture.
There are a lot of other reasons, but those are really small ones that I can answer easily. They're also worried that this is something that colleges won't care about (I answered this problem numerous times and they forget each time). They think, after all this time, that it's a joke. It's just a vacation for me. I really don't think I'd be this stubborn for a vacation and if I just wanted to go for vacation, then why would I spend my money going on a program?
My dad asked me why I wanted to go so badly. How could I answer him? I told him that one of my reasons was to improve my Korean and both parents laughed....a LOT. In all seriousness, they don't care at all about that.
My other reasons such as knowing about my background more, knowing the history of Korea, understanding my culture better, etc. are not going to move them to tears. Knowing them, they'll laugh their butts off.
You're probably thinking that I should talk to them and tell them my reasons for wanting to go. I've mentioned them (not all at one time because the response would probably make me go crazy) and they laughed at every single one of them.
First off, he said that the online course idea wouldn't "fit" me because he'd like me to go and see the competition I have out there. Let me ask you something. Even if I did get an idea of who I'm going against when I'm applying for those bigshot schools, why would that be an advantage? In all honesty, when I come back home after that thing is over, I'm most likely...not going to do anything different. I am not going to take up music lessons, do ballet, become a track star, be a genius at violin, and etc. etc. Seriously, I want to do so many things already and I already know what the competition is like. There's a nice little thing called the Internet on which there are forums where people talk about this stuff. I've seen statistics people posted and the schools they got into. I already have a general idea about what "competition" I have. He said by going to Harvard, not only would I be able to see the competition, but I'd be able to experience what being away from home is really like and being on a college campus really is like.
I'm extremely frustrated by the things he said and my parents kind of noticed that I was in a bad mood since I wasn't responding, smiling, or being my loud self when I got home, but I didn't want to talk about it with them even though they kept asking me what was bothering me because I'm feeling bad enough already, you know? I dont really need to hear their words...especially my mom. I REALLY don't need to hear what she has to say right now and I don't really need to see her looking pissed off at me...I don't need her ranting and harshly talking to me...and therefore, making me even more annoyed and pissed off...and I'm kind of upset because the deadline's not too far into the future and I don't have enough time.
And then I got all upset over something else. Maybe it's immature to think so, but I got really annoyed that people are trying to dictate my life. Yeah, this sounds like the typical teenager whining, but do you understand? People have been doing this to me since I was young. They just expect me to go along and they basically outlined my entire life. Do this and that, stay away from these courses, stay away from alcohol, drugs, and sex (which I wouldn't partake in anyway, so this doesn't really bother me), don't be friends with this kid, make sure to stay good friends with this kid, don't listen to this music, you have to like this type of stuff and then when you go to Harvard (I actually don't want to go here...long story), you can graduate and become a doctor or lawyer, or make us proud and somehow miraculously be both. No exceptions. You deviate even a little bit from our plan and you're a disgrace to everyone. So basically, I was thinking about how if I even mention something I want to do, most of the time, it's small things so my parents don't find it a big deal, but if I ask for some big thing, they make such a HUGE deal out of it and say that I always get what I want in life, sometimes I take things for granted, and I don't think I'm spoiled, but I actually am spoiled a tiny bit.
Anyway, back to the main point, I think I really must want this because if you want to know, I don't cry. I hate crying and I get embarrassed if someone even sees my lip tremble, hear my voice crack, or see tears form in my eyes or even one tear rolling down. If I have to cry, I do it where no one sees or hears me such as under my bed covers SILENTLY (I mastered the art of crying silently HAHAHA) while everyone's asleep and the lights are all out. ....and I kind of shed bitter, angsty, frustrated tears today....and I stopped myself after a minute or two of course, haha.
It's so annoying how all the adults in my life think that this is just a silly phase I'm going through. Apparently, I've been in a phase all my life and I haven't known it because I've been wanting to go to Korea pretty much since ....I don't even remember...since I was little...and then I discovered this program to YFU. If I'm really going through a phase, would I go to such lengths to research intensively about these types of programs for 3 years? I went on YFU so many times, researched numerous other organizations, talked to YFU representatives, talked to a college admissions officer from Yale University, talked it over with some teachers, asked for more information from YFU (they sent me a package of packets and other information), am subscribed to the YFU newsletter which I greedily devour whenever it comes, etc. etc. I don't know. Apparently, this is some stupid thing. Sorry, this is basically a rant...and I just forgot what I was going to say. Lol. Oh yeah, I don't know...I tried making things better a long time ago (a year or two ago) by giving in and sort of agreeing that a year is too long so I settled for a summer instead. I mean, isn't that more acceptable? It's not like I'm missing school or anything...that I can understand especially with me taking the most rigorous core courses as possible. I gave in a bit, but they're not willing to do their share of compromising.
I actually decided a few months ago that blogging would be the best thing to do if I did a summer program with YFU or another organization that deals with student exchanges. The only blog site I was really familiar with was xanga, but ever since I went on www.cultures-shocked.org (GREAT site for those of you that are high school students and wish to go abroad for a summer, semester, or a whole academic school year and want to find more information about student exchanges from fellow peers), I've seen a couple of people with Vox accounts and they all claim it's great, easy to use, and you can upload pictures easily.
I wasn't expecting much, but the layout is great and everything's so easy to find so I think I'll be sticking with this place for my experience in South Korea. Yes, I want to go to South Korea.
I'm a bit tired right now since I lost one hour of sleep (but the whole sunlight-until-6-PM was worth it) so I'll be continuing my heated post about my quest to convince my parents to let me go to South Korea tomorrow or some other day.
Here's what I wrote on www.cultures-shocked.org though (it's written below in blue). (: Just for your amusement while you wait. Suggestions would be greatly appreciated though.
Despite my lack of interest in Harvard, I agree that this is a good opportunity and sadly, it's probably the closest I'll ever be to being in an Ivy haha. My other option is going on a YFU summer program to South Korea. There is more info available at their site: www.yfu-usa.org. I've always been interested in traveling and I love learning about cultures.
In my entire life, I have never been to Korea even to visit relatives which is something most Korean kids do. I've lived in the States for my entire life and being able to fall back on using English if I don't know the words in English because most Korean kids I know already know English, my Korean is not exactly what you would label as "fluent" but it's sufficient enough to get by. I don't know the history of Korea either, and although this sounds extremely corny, I want to know my "roots".
I've always wanted to go to Korea, but my desire to go became really apparent after 5th grade. My desire to go has grown exponentially, but I have stopped asking my parents every year if we could go on vacation to Korea in the summer/winter break. The answer is always the same..."Maybe next year" which basically means "No and never". I don't really understand why they don't want me to go. It's as if they think it will not impress the college admissions officers and it doesn't count for anything. If i really had to go, they want me to go to a European country where there's more "history" and etc. (basically a place that looks more impressive in their minds than puny Korea). They don't think this can benefit me at all and they don't think I really want this. They keep telling me that if I want to go so badly, I should go during college. That won't benefit me really and there's a big chance I'd be too busy with my studies. Anyway, i don't even know if i'm going to deal with science or the arts or business or whatever so theres a chance that my major will have nothing to do with dealing with foreign countries, you know? So basically, there might not be a need for me to go abroad during college.
Since I've shown an interest in Korean entertainment, they think that my real motive for wanting to go to Korea is to go to sight celebrities and squeal over how I saw them. Honestly, if that were the case, I'd be happy with staying in NY because there's a certain thing called the Internet and it's a waste of money jsut to go there to stalk celebrities everyday, not to mention extremely creepy and unnerving as well. As silly the idea seems to my parents, I really do want to go there for the culture and history. If it means that I have to prove this to them by going to a gazillion museums and palaces in Korea, so be it. I don't really care because I'd probably freak out and take pictures like crazy and get 74571 information pamphlets to read them over.
I mean, I alway can go to Korea for vacation (most likely as a graduation gift in 2 years if I really begged), but this isn't something where you go wild in a foreign country without your parents' supervision. It's a credible program and you get to live with a host family. I was lucky enough to have the opportunity to be with a home stay family for a weekend as part of my schedule in Japan on the People to People Student Ambassadors program to Japan and I've loved the experience. You get to experience what it's like to live in that country from a different perspective and take part in the daily activities of that society. There's also a possibility that you can visit a local school through this program; if I went for the academic year program, I would attend school on a daily basis, but unfortunately, my parents are extremely against that idea and although I'm enthusiastic about it, it's not the best idea especially with my junior year coming up.
I'm a bit frustrated because my parents keep saying no vehemently and I've asked a few times in the past...and the answer was always the same. I can't even bring it up into the conversation anymore because I feel really uncomfortable, already knowing what they'll say. They have mentioned that it was expensive, but I really would take out my time to fundraise so that I will pay for the majority of my trip. I'm determined to go. Another thing they mentioned was that I promised that I would take the SAT II Bio in October and since I have the whole summer to study for it, I'd probably ace the test in October and I actually canceled it instead of just leaving it, thinking that although I did well, I didn't study as hard as I could so I would try to get a better score. It's already March and I still haven't taken it again (well, I did in December but that test was oddly difficult. My friend said that the January one was extremely easy though) so understandably, my parents are extremely annoyed by this and I know this is my fault but really, it's not the end of the world. I really wish I could convince my parents that I really do want this. I've been researching information, finding out ways to raise money, and talking to people from that organization ever since 7th grade. For three years, I've been interested and the interest didn't go away; in fact, I think it's growing stronger. I really think that this can be a really good opportunity for me. Not only will this be able to let me find my "true self" and understand my parents and their history more, it also helps me appreciate what i have for living in the US as well (:
So anyway, I know that was REALLY REALLY REALLY long to go through, but do you guys have any suggestions as to what I can do to convince my parents? I really am running short on time since the deadline for the application is April 1. I'm really upset over this actually and I can't even bring it up in the conversation anymore with my parents everytime the subject of what I'm going to do over the summer pops up (like today in the car) because I know what they'll say and if I even HINT at it, my mom automatically tells me she wants me to be quiet and stop talking. I don't understand....I REALLY want this with all my heart. I mean, there ARE other countries that she might prefer more, but I just don't feel this...connection and I think that's very important in going abroad. If you don't feel that, I don't really think you're going to make as much out of it as you can possibly do. I mean, doesn't she realize that I've been researching for THREE years? I think that shows that I'm kind of serious about this and it's not just a "phase". Also, I know what a home stay experience is like a bit, so it's not like she can say I don't understand what it'll be like to do that. My dad doesn't care really, but he's saying that I should go to South Korea during college, but if my mom says yes, then he'll DEFINITELY let me go. That's how it works haha.
Yeah, sorry this is really long but...I'm really at a loss right now.
Ohhh God i'm really REALLY sorry but.. come on, there must be any chance or anything else that u can... read more
on Get back on track.